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The Venture Bros. episode
Tears of a Sea Cow
Season 3
Orig. Airdate July 20, 2008
Writer(s) Doc Hammer
Director Jackson Publick
Production # 3-34
previous Ep # next
What Goes Down, Must Come Up 34 Now Museum - Now You Don't!

Working Title(s)
Murder O' Clock


After a series of failed archenemy encounters, most ending in murder, The Monarch longs for the days when he arched Dr. Venture. When he hears that Dr. Venture is at a science convention, The Monarch grabs 21 and 24 for a night of trashing the Venture Compound. Will The Monarch violate Guild orders, in more ways than one?


  • The Monarch, Dr. Mrs. The Monarch, and the Pupae Twins arch Dr. Dugong at his lair.
  • Dr. Dugong is so lame that the Monarch shoots him point-blank and kills him.
  • Hank, Dean, and Dermott are alone at the compound with H.E.L.P.eR.
  • H.E.L.P.eR. is set to "drum" via internal synthesizer because Hank and Dermott are trying to start a band.
  • Dr. Mrs. The Monarch is pissed that the Monarch isn't taking his new arch enemies seriously, and after they argue, the Monarch leaves in a huff.
  • He, 21, and 24 decide to go wreak havoc at the Venture compound because they know Dr. Venture's out.
  • Back at the compound, Dean is so fed up with H.E.L.P.eR.'s drumming that he inadvertantly disables the compound's auditory security features to shut the robot up.
  • The Monarch heads to Dr. Venture's lab, 21 chases Hank, and 24 follows Dermott. Dean cuddles with his stuffed giraffe.
  • Tim-Tom and Kevin tell Dr. Mrs. The Monarch that her husband is gone, and after she dons her old Dr. Girlfriend costume, they head to the compound.
  • 21 darts Hank with a tranquilizer, 24 pays Dermott off, and when Dean finds the Monarch having sex with G.U.A.R.D.O., the Monarch escapes using a bit of trickery.
  • The Monarch and his crew get picked up by Dr. Mrs. the Monarch and they all go home.


The Monarch and Dr. Mrs. The Monarch have been assigned by the Guild to arch Dr. Dugong, and along with Tim-Tom and Kevin, storm his compound. Dugong, communicating via his intercom, sends his robot (a pink Mr. Roboto lookalike) out to handle the intruders; he is quickly taken care of by Tim Tom and Kevin (dressed as The Pupae Twins) with two quick stabs to the head. Dr. Dugong acknowledges the loss of his robot and begins to speak about his inner sanctum. Dr. Mrs. The Monarch destroys the intercom, much to The Monarch's relief, and she and her Murderous Moppets blast their way into Dugong's room. A reluctant Monarch slowly trots in after them as Dugong begins yet another speech about his lair. He is quickly interrupted by Dr. Mrs. The Monarch who begs The Monarch to get into the moment. He agrees and Dr. Dugong resumes his speech, which is again cut short as The Monarch and Dr. Mrs. The Monarch demand his plans (or whatever), to which he replies he has only "a tank full of gentle cuttlefish." The Monarch can no longer take Dr. Dugong's lameness and refuses to take part in this arching. He is then persuaded by his wife when she tells him to think of Dugong as Dr. Venture. The Monarch uses this to motivate himself, although he becomes so motivated that he kills Dr. Dugong.

Meanwhile, back at the compound, Hank and Dermott have started a band (with H.E.L.P.eR. on drums) which they are going to call either Lip Glossary or Goat Blood Sacrifice. Dean has decided to do a special feature on the "band" in his newspaper, Venture Home News. Dean also answers mail to his readers who "number in the teens," and give them personal advice. His readers include Hank, Henchman 21 (who reads it seriously), and The Monarch (who reads it jokingly).

Dr. Venture and Brock have gone to Washington to unveil Dr. Venture's newest invention, the Boom-Broom™, leaving the boys home alone. The Monarch and Dr. Mrs. The Monarch have a discussion about what went wrong with Dr. Dugong, mostly the blatant killing of the doctor, which the Guild strictly prohibits, especially on the first arch. Dr. Mrs. The Monarch chastises The Monarch for killing his arch and threatening to quit if he continues to get "lame arches." He remarks that since the moppets have come into play that his henchmen have nothing to do and just play Guitar Hero all day, and then he and his henchmen leave.

Why are you telling me this...?

Back at the compound Hank and Dermott are fighting boredom by attempting stunts around the boys' room, while Dean tries to maintain a mature attitude, as he believes that his maturity will be rewarded with freedom.

At the Cocoon, The Monarch, while reminiscing with his his henchmen, hears that Dr. Venture has gone, and assumes that the entire family has left and takes 21 and 24 with him to go wreck up the Venture compound. Their arrival stirs the boys into action and cause Hank and Dermott to go on the look-out for aliens, while Dean searches the inside of the compound. And while the moppets alert Dr. Mrs. The Monarch that The Monarch is missing, as well as 21, 24, and the Monarchmobile, The Monarch's raiding party is attacked by the Venture compound's security system. The Monarch takes off into the lab and 21 and 24 take cover in the hangar, and when Hank and Dermott pass by they chase them, 24 going after Dermott and 21 pursuing Hank. While Dermott is quickly caught by 24, Dr. Mrs. The Monarch mobilizes the henchmen in the Cocoon, who are thrilled, and takes off towards the Venture compound.

Hank and 21 are still running around until 21 calls a truce, but only to tell Hank that he is immortal (and to hit him with a tranquilizer dart he mistakenly believes is poisoned). Elsewhere, inside the compound, Dean encounters The Monarch giving G.U.A.R.D.O. chlamydia, much to his disgust. The Monarch rolls with the situation and gives Dean an on the spot speech using reverse psychology about how if Dean tells anyone about what he saw, he has passed the last test to become evil, just like The Monarch (right before The Monarch makes a quick escape with his pants down). Meanwhile, 24 is bribing Dermott with his weaponry to not tell anyone about the situation. Dr. Mrs. The Monarch arrives to take The Monarch and the henchmen back home.

Two weeks later Dr. Mrs. The Monarch has arranged with the Guild for herself and The Monarch to arch Dr. Jonas Venture Jr..

Fun Facts[edit]

  • Dr. Dugong's robot resembles the robot from the "Mr. Roboto" music video by the band Styx.
  • The game that The Monarch's henchmen play "using a little plastic baby guitar" is likely from the Guitar Hero series.
  • When Dermott and Hank are jumping around in the boys' room, Dermott mentions needing his tabi boots. Tabi boots are footwear traditionally worn by ninjas.
  • Dermott also mentions Gymkata in the same scene. Gymkata is a cheesy martial arts movie from 1985 in which an Olympic gymnast (played by an actual Olympic gymnast) combines gymnastics and martial arts, hence the film's title.
  • The percussion beat that H.E.L.P.eR. is playing is the "Samba" beat from the Casio SA-21 synthesizer.

[edit] Voice Talent
Voice Talent
Michael Sinterniklaas Dean Venture
Chris McCulloch Hank Venture
The Monarch
Henchman 24
Tim-Tom Moppet
Dr. Dugong
Doc Hammer Dr. Mrs. The Monarch
Henchman 21
Dermott Fictel
Kevin Moppet